“I’ve always wondered why we have to go through so many injustices, and why many times, it seems to be for no apparent reason. They simply pop up out of nowhere, in the most unusual circumstances. We don’t even get a chance to prove that we didn’t have anything to do with it, or the people involved.

Along comes the accusations, gossip, dirty looks; it makes me want to throw in the towel and run far, far away. I feel like leaving behind everything I’ve achieved, go somewhere where nobody knows me and start a new life. But I can’t look back, much less stop and throw it all away. Asking church leaders for advice is often tiresome because they always say the same thing: ‘God will honor you, persevere, have faith, etc…’

But, the following thought continues to replay inside my mind: It’s easy to tell a single 30 year old woman to wait on God for the right person to marry, when you are already happily married. When you already have everything you want, in spite of the struggles, it’s easier for you to deal with your problems because there are two people fighting for the same purpose. It seems like all pastors and pastor’s wives always repeat the same thing: ‘Be patient, be faithful, God will honor you.’ But when will that happen, I don’t see the light at the end of the tunnel. What should I do? Like I mentioned above, it is easy to ask someone else to wait when you already have what they are looking for. (That’s my opinion)

PS: I continue to trust in God, even though I haven’t received an answer.”

Dear Friend,

What is it that you want to hear? Would you rather hear me tell you to abandon the faith? Honestly, I don’t know of any other way for an unmarried 30 year old woman of God to be blessed, other than for her to trust in God and use her faith. Now, if you know of any other alternatives, please feel free to tell us about them. From what you’ve written, although it ends with ‘I continue to trust in God’, you seem like a very frustrated person, who constantly considers abandoning the faith. And if your love life is more important than your faith, you will definitely continue living with that frustration. When it comes to those who put God first, no matter what happens, no matter how much time it takes, they will never, ever think about quitting simply because they have not yet been blessed. Or do you think that pastors and pastor’s wives are not also waiting to receive blessings? Have you ever heard about my brother? How about my son? Should I abandon the faith or the work of God because of the ‘little things’ that haven’t happened in my life yet? No, no and no!!! Any blessing is considered insignificant when compared to my salvation.

In faith,

Cristiane Cardoso.