Our first post in this series caused quite a stir, and this is good. It’s through your comments that I get to know your needs. 🙂

We talked about respect and how important it is that a wife respects her husband. Then, some of you asked me how to respect someone who does not respect you?

Well, for me to respect my husband, I need to respect myself first. This means that I should have high standards in relation to everything and everyone—and this includes my relationships. However, it does not mean that I should disrespect those who disrespect me. A woman who respects herself will respect others, regardless of who they are, and the same applies to husband and wife. It’s not because your husband is rude to you that you have to be rude to him too; this will make you look just like him and will not solve any problems between you. But if you respect even when he’s rude to you, he will feel uncomfortable. He may even pretend he does not care, but he will feel bad about it, believe me! Everyone who pays good with evil has a heavy conscience and time makes it even heavier…

Let’s say your husband betrays you with other women. If you respect yourself, you will not tolerate it. You will not disrespect him, but if you respect yourself, you will put an end to this relationship, until your husband becomes a real man. When you respect yourself, you do not put up with maltreatment, abuse or infidelity!

It’s also good to emphasize that I write for women, so you will hardly ever find an article for men. Though I am talking about the role of a wife, it does not mean that it’s only the wife who needs to change. I am talking about women because they are my readers. 🙂

Well, I think we’ve explained everything about respect; now it’s time to move on to the next lesson I’ve learned from my mother that really helped me:

Being a good housewife.

If you want to get married, you need to know how to take care of a home.

Oh-oh… I’m anticipating a wave of comments on this post, LOL! Friends, before I got married, I learned all about taking care of a house:

• General cleaning once a week
• Daily cleaning of the most used rooms, e.g. kitchen and bathrooms
• Changing the bed sheets once a week
• Changing the bath towels twice a week
• Washing clothes by hand and in the washing machine
• Ironing
• Cooking
• Keeping the house tidy
• Taking care of the plants
• And keeping my pots shining

I think that’s all… Phew!

I learned that my wardrobe should always be organized, so I washed and ironed our clothes two or three times a week. Later on, I learned that not everything needed to be ironed. 🙂 If you take the underwear from the tumble dryer as soon as it finishes and fold them nicely, they will look as if you had ironed them—the same applies to some types of bed sheets.

In order to have everything in order, I would do several things at the same time; I’d prepare the breakfast and, while I waited for Renato (and sometimes other couples who lived with us) to come, I’d quickly toss one load in the machine. We’d have breakfast together and then I’d clean up the kitchen (later on, I got a dishwasher, which helped a lot!). I’d clean my bedroom and the bathroom until about 11am—not forgetting to put another load in the machine. At 11am, I’d start cooking; by 12.30pm, lunch would be ready. I’d tidy up the kitchen and set the table. Then, we’d have lunch. I’d clean the kitchen and take the afternoon to iron. I’d clean the other rooms another day. By 4pm, I’d have finished ironing, and since I had cooked enough food for dinner, now it was time to take a shower and go to church. 🙂

A good housewife must learn to be practical and fast, but she cannot only do this in life… Uh-uh! Housekeeping is only a part of our lives and it should not take too much of our time.

This was my routine because I did not work, but not every day was like this… and it worked for us. It is up to every housewife to adapt to a routine. If you work and do not have time to take care of the house, do some tasks before leaving home in the morning and leave others for when you arrive home in the afternoon. If you leave everything in order at all times, you’ll have less things to do… and if your husband can help you, great!

We both felt comfortable at home, though sometimes the house would not even have windows (I’ve already lived in an apartment where our bedroom did not have windows)… but I always enjoyed my home, this is why I’d take good care of it, regardless of its size or location… With time, Renato learned to do the same thing, and today he puts his dirty clothes in the laundry basket, he puts his shoes away, and hangs his suit so that it does not get creases… but he did not learn this because I wanted or because I forced him to. IT’S A RULE OF THUMB AND WE CANNOT FORGET IT, OK, GIRLS?