The following is the continuation of the previously posted testimony of Maria de Fatima da Cruz Carvalho.

At first, everything seemed rosy. It seemed that I was a happy woman with a perfect marriage. I was envied by many, but my day-to-day life was all a lie. Inside of me was an emptiness, a sadness, pain, just a pretense of happiness.

A year later, I was pregnant. It was a planned pregnancy, but pregnancy problems began to emerge that I couldn’t understand. My husband started getting farther and that “angel” drew even closer. I was an independent woman, trained in physical education, and was very stubborn. I insisted that I wanted to keep working, even with my big belly but my husband insisted that I stay home.

At this point, the “angel” began to lay in bed with us. I became afraid of him, to the point that I often lashed out at my husband, because this angel was there between us. My husband thought that the harsh things I was saying were meant for him, and he became aggressive with me.

Many times, I felt a hand caressing my belly. I thought it was my husband. But when I opened my eyes and saw that it was the “angel”, I’d scream. The angel told me: “Fatima, you will be very rich, but know that there’s a price to pay.” I didn’t understand anything.

At this point, I had stopped using drugs because my child was on the way. But I would have strange attacks, fainting spells and nervous breakdowns. I looked healthy, but I was extremely nervous and irritable with a constant headache, but many told me it was normal.

My son was born in November. I became very rich and the problems multiplied. I was openly envied and hated by those around me, but I was oblivious to it all.

The “angel” came to be constantly, day and night, by my side. The fainting spells, the fits of rage and the anxiety all increased and I felt an inner loneliness. The strange thing was that I had money, a beautiful house by the sea, well employed, and a beautiful son, but felt a great emptiness. Despite this sadness that consumed me, I had to pretend to be happy.

I was always upset. One day I’d be normal, the other day sick, and nobody could find the cause of my distress. I had headaches that felt like everything around me was crushing in on my skull. My husband began to drink. He felt very disconnected from me and began to give more attention to friends than to my son and me. We had a lot of money and we were very young. It was around 1983/84.

The “angel” was now trying to touch me. At times I’d say, “Don’t touch me. Get out!” But no one could see it, just me. What torment! How could I ever tell anyone about this? I began to think of how I could escape that angel that was becoming even more fearful to me. Again that terrible feeling of fear was taking over, that same fear I felt as a child.

Maria de Fatima da Cruz Carvalho