Something happens when you share your problem with someone who can help you. The monster, that tormented your mind, once removed, seems more like a mosquito. Zap! It’s dead.  Just listening to yourself talking to someone about your problem and organizing your thoughts to explain what is going on already helps. (This is one of the reasons why many times psychologists are paid just to listen.) 

In countless occasions, I’ve seen this happen. People come to me asking for advice and they look as if they were carrying a wardrobe on their shoulders, just like the old ones you might have seen at your grandparents house as a child. They come to us looking tired, afflicted, feeling incapable, stressed and, sometimes, even feeling stupid. But after a few minutes, things start to change. They get their head together, the burden is lifted, and a smile returns to their face. Apparently, nothing has changed in their lives, but inside everything has changed. And when we change inside, we change outside as well.

I have also seen the opposite happen: people who carried a problem for years and never asked for help. They were too ashamed or too proud to ask for help. Whatever the reason, the consequence is always the same: the situation becomes unbearable and they end up being overtaken by their problems. The funny thing is, when this happens, they end up feeling more ashamed and humiliated than if they had sought help.

I’m not saying that you have to tell everybody about your problems, absolutely not. There are many problems that we can solve by ourselves, and that’s great. But we need to be aware of our limitations. Why do we turn to doctors, lawyers and even colleagues who are more experienced than us? Because we are aware of our limitations, yes, there are people who know better than us.

So, if you are going through a similar situation—whatever it is—and you cannot overcome it on your own, it’s time to look for help. But bear one thing in mind: you should look for someone who can truly help you, who has good character and good reputation concerning what you need help with.

Get rid of this monster before it finishes you off.