Blog Renato Cardoso | 18 de February de 2015 - 22:21

The Bulletproof Marriage Movement

Bulletproof Marriage is no longer just a book, course, audiobook or souvenir. It has become a movement, a way of thinking and conducting your marriage; not just something you read, come to a momentary conclusion then move on to the next big thing. It has become something that changes the way you look at the world and your love relationship; it makes you think more about your marriage and how to help other couples bulletproof their marriage against the plague of divorce as well.

Take as an example the controversy about 50 Shades of Grey. When we decided to publish an article from another author about the subject, to alert those who don’t know what it is about, what happened? Many people showed their appreciation for the alert, but others reacted in an almost hysterical way. Some stated, among other absurdities: “What you really want is to sell more Bulletproof Marriage books.” These are so blind they can’t see that the more people with problems in their marriage, the higher will be the demand for Bulletproof Marriage. Therefore, if our goal was to sell more books, we’d do quite the opposite: We’d keep quiet or even encourage people to do things that could jeopardize their marriage. The formula is simple, even though it seems hard for some to comprehend it: more couples with problems equals more copies of Bulletproof Marriage sold. Therefore, it would be counterproductive to alert people if we wanted to increase the book’s sales.

But this experience reveals the need to always think about your marriage as something subject to inevitable attacks— which are not always perceptible. Shakespeare said, “The devil is quite a gentleman.” I am not a great fan of Shakespeare, but I think he summarized quite well the way bad things are easily accepted by people. They come to us dressed in fine clothing, elegant, romantic, and seductive, in a way to not raise any suspicion about their evil nature — some readers of 50 Shades would say “A perfect Mr. Grey”. And so they enter people’s life and marriage as a Trojan horse. When it finally dawns on them, it is already too late.

50 Shades of Grey will fade away after a while and no one will be talking about the books or the movie. But other similar or worse ones will come. And it doesn’t end there, other threats to marriage will keep emerging and bringing more attacks:

  • An interesting person who will show up at your husband’s or wife’s job
  • Routine in the couple’s life will knock at the door
  • Problems with the children will test your relationship
  • More or less money will put your love to the test
  • The couples sexual drive will be tested through time
  • The conditions for online cheating will keep improving (Facebook, WhatsApp, etc.)
  • Divorce and break-ups will become more and more common and glamourous

And so your marriage will be constantly bombarded, even silently, by forces and ideas contrary to it.

For this reason, Bulletproof Marriage is more than just a book. It is a way of thinking and conducting your marriage. The same way you protect your most valuable assets, your marriage must be protected. And thinking like this goes further: You become a guardian and promoter of intelligent love. You pay more attention to the couples around you. When someone shows they are struggling with something, you share what you have learned. You become happy to see that a couple was helped through the advice you gave them. You talk to your children about it. You ask an engaged couple if they’ve already bulletproofed their marriage.

It’s the Bulletproof Marriage movement. Intelligent people practicing and sharing intelligent love.

Thank you for being part of this movement.


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