thumb do blog Renato Cardoso
thumb do blog Renato Cardoso

IntelliMen Challenge #49


Men. Intelligent. 
© 2013


Challenge #49

Don’t start before completing Challenge #48.
If you want to join the IntelliMen Project, start from Challenge #1.


Challenge: Take responsibility for your mistakes and ask for forgiveness.

Explanation: “Men don’t make mistakes, they’re just given the wrong information” – this is the mindset of many men. The truth is that male pride does not allow us to acknowledge our own mistakes. We think we’re right even when we’re wrong. That’s right. “If” we make mistakes, it’s because we were provoked, we were only reacting to something someone else did or said. It’s never our fault… never.

This is one of men’s greatest weaknesses, because almost always, mistakes are the greatest teachers. But if we don’t own up to them, how will we ever learn from them?

Being an intelligent man means recognizing that you don’t know everything, recognizing that you have faults. Being a man means being strong enough to ask for forgiveness when you’re wrong.

Your challenge this week is to recognize your mistakes, take responsibility for them and apologize to whoever is owed an apology.

This goes for mistakes you made today, and for those you made 10 years ago and haven’t yet owned up to or apologized for. May may be avoiding or refusing to speak to a family member for a long time because of a mistake you made, or vice versa. Your wife may still be holding a grudge for a mistake you made but never owned up to. Your parents might be waiting for you to call and say “Mom, Dad, I messed up and want to ask for your forgiveness.” Maybe even God Himself is waiting for you to do this.

If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
1 John 1:9

Before quickly dismissing this thought from your head, and assuming that you don’t need to ask anyone for forgiveness, think carefully:

What mistakes have you still not taken responsibility for? Could you have hurt someone who is still waiting for an apology? Is there anyone you avoid or who you’ve cut off contact with?

* If this “someone” is an ex or someone else with whom contact could mean more harm than good, first weigh the wisdom of making contact. The idea is not to make matters worse or to cause anyone any discomfort, such as your wife. Be prudent.

Notebook: Write down the answers to the questions above in your notebook. Begin by making a list of major mistakes that come to mind. Then make a list of people who’ve been hurt and those who need an apology. This week I want you to contact them, take responsibility for your mistakes and apologize.

Official Partner: Talk about the difficulty that men have in taking responsibility for their mistakes and in asking for forgiveness. Have a conversation on how this affects each of you.

Deadline: You may begin working on this challenge immediately and complete it before Challenge #50 which you can begin a week from now.

Post: After – and only after – you have completed the challenge, post your comments on the IntelliMenWorld Facebook or Twitter page, (not on your own page) and write the following:

IntelliMen Challenge #49 done: I took responsibility for my mistakes and asked for forgiveness of those that I offended. (Add any other comments in regards to this.)


Links: (when tweeting, use @intelliMenworld)

Verification Checklist

☐ I identified my mistakes and the people I have wronged
☐ I asked for forgiveness and took responsibility for my mistakes
☐ I wrote down my reflections in my Notebook
☐ I spoke to my Partner about the challenge
☐ I posted my comments on Facebook/Twitter



Saying, “I’m sorry” is the same as saying, “I apologize,” except at a funeral. Demetri Martin